In one week, my husband, son and I will be traveling to the Czech Republic for our first family vacation. That’s the official story, but my hubby and I have a covert agenda. We will be trying one last time to grow our family. We’ve been trying to have a second child since 2010. Miscarriages, IUI and IVF with PGD with no viable eggs told us it was time to move on. We met with an adoption agency, talked with egg donor services, and egg banks. Honestly, the bizarrely sexy pictures of potential US donors and the fact that she could leave us high and dry was more than we could stomach.
Enter Sue from IVF Traveler—our guide and friend. She introduced me to the idea of European Egg donors and patiently walked me through the process and my options. The cost difference was a motivating factor, but the regularity of the process was the real draw. We’re guaranteed two good eggs on our timetable. Sue found three clinics for us to consider. We felt best about Reprogensis in Brno because of their embryo monitoring technology. I don’t think we could do this without Sue. She’s extremely knowledgeable and compassionate.
The anonymity insisted on by Czech law gave us (well, me) pause. I can’t imagine having that free fall of not knowing where you came from genetically. I’ve read everything I could find on donor kids and the best way to help them adjust to their place in the world. But at the end of the day, I realized we live in interesting times. We are lucky to have this chance. We will find a way to define our family together.
I must admit the loss of my fertility hurt like hell. I’m still adjusting to the sting of it. And while I’d like to be pregnant again, I have no illusions about it. At my age—42—it’s not a walk in the park. But the best thing I have to give a future child of our family is my son and my husband. Having a connection to them makes the idea of a donor egg more precious somehow. It’s an emotional, sentimental reason.
So we’re packing and planning and quietly hoping. My son can’t wait to see the castles. We can’t wait to watch him. And hopefully we’ll be bringing back more than a souvenir.